the deep thoughts

Who Looks Better as Red Sonja?

PARIS - It sounds like a scene from "Fight Club."

French police say camouflaged paparazzi who managed to get onto the grounds of Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt's chateau in southern France on Thursday fought with the Hollywood couple's guards. Both the paparazzi and the Jolie-Pitt's head of security confirmed the confrontation but gave widely different versions of events.

Source: Yahoo!

Ugh, le connards.

Heather Locklear’s ex-husband Richie Sambora (who struggled with alcoholism) called her daily during her recent four-week stint in rehab for depression and anxiety, the Chicago Sun-Times reports. (The paper claims she also may have been treated for prescription drug issues.)

It is among the revelations a source at the clinic tells the paper.

The source says that Locklear, 46, told the other patients at the Arizona facility that she felt the world was closing in on her before she sought help. The source adds that Locklear felt people expected her “to be perfect, always beautiful.”

During her stay, the source says Locklear “couldn’t have been warmer or more approachable. There was no diva behavior. She was totally genuine, down-to-earth and warm.”

She often enjoyed riding horses. She even told patients that she wanted to make a Western film “so I can better work on my riding skills,” the insider says. At one point during rehab, Locklear was overheard singing and said she’d love to record an album, the source says.

She also kept a daily journal and told other patients that she’s working on a couple of books, including a memoir and “a coffee table-style book about design,” the source says.

In addition to the daily calls from Sambora, her current beau, actor Jack Wagner — whom the source says she could wed “soon” — visited her several times.

But it was her daughter Ava, 10, who “helped Heather get through the program. She knew that little girl was back home waiting for her, and she talked about her constantly.”

The source adds that Locklear has also watched Denise Richards’ reality show.

“Heather thinks the show is a riot,” the source says, “but only because it makes Denise look like an idiot.”

source

James McAvoy will reportedly pick up £12million to star in two sequels to this summer’s blockbuster film Wanted.

Hollywood bosses have given the go-ahead to the action thrillers in which Scottish McAvoy, 29, plays office nerd-turned-assassin Wesley Gibson.

A studio insider said: “It’ll be the biggest payday of his career. There’s no way they could do the sequels without him.”

Angelina Jolie will also feature in the sequels, reprising her role as hit-woman Fox.

http://www.qwantz.com/archive/001270.html

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July 25th, 2008: You guys are so great. I mentioned the Jay-Z / Mario 3 mashup in yesterday's comic, and Joahmonkey made it happen! You can download Dust Off Your Cartridge here (the download link is the brown "download this file" in the right-hand column.) So awesome! Thanks Joahmonkey.

In other cool stuff news: your friend and mine Kean Soo collaborated with Kevin Fanning to produce Baby's First Internet which I predict you will find very enjoyable.